11 months, 8 days away from his birthday

Parenting is hard! I don't think any book can really spell it out for you. Not the worry, not the nail biting, or the bone tired fears at midnight. No book can really prepare you for wondering if your choice of food in a jar is going to send him on the right kinds of path in life. Or prepare you for the wracking guilt when you yell at him in a moment of pure 'end of your rope'-ness.

It certainly is odd, parenting. I never thought I would be so happy to see someone who hits me in the face, grabs my glasses, and has me running ragged after him. Morning, I love seeing the little guy. Even if I'm exhausted, or he's being particularly butt-like. I never stop getting a little leap of joy when he reaches for me to give me a hug, or because he just.. wants me.

I used to be desperate for some way to amuse myself, but now I can play with Griffin all day, or watch him play by himself. While I do it, I get the sense that this is something I need to soak up, because it'll be gone faster than I can blink. So I do.

We went to the Zoo! Griffin was the happiest I have *ever* seen him. His father took him around the zoo on his shoulders, and he got to see all kinds of animals. His mother sat on a bench, mostly, because people stole the zoo's wheelchairs and she had to go by crutch.

I must go now, to sleep. Tomorrow is another day with the little man, and I want to be able to think straight. Have a good sleep, everyone.

Soon, he will be one year old!

Wow.
Autumn